Sometimes it would seem the men who question why I am still single are the ones who let me get away.

We’ll start with one of my exes. For many years we had a strained relationship at best. Actually, we were each others worst enemies. I don’t know exactly how we went from hating each other to becoming friends again… I guess time really can heal deep wounds and forgiveness is possible. In this new state of friendship, my ex admitted he considered me “the one that got away”.  And I don’t think there is anyone on this earth who wishes me to find happiness and love more than him.


There’s a guy I met after I graduated college. We met at a work-related event. I only remember meeting him a couple of times, but he had caught my eye, and I had caught his too apparently. It became one of those situations that the timing just never really worked out for us. We never dated, but we both felt a connection. He reached out to me recently. It’s always interesting to hear how someone far away shares how they have kept up with you through social media. He shared with me how he felt about me decades ago and that he, too, saw me as “the one that got away”. He had always hoped I would find great love and happiness, since he couldn’t give that to me and admitted he was more upset with himself knowing now how my past relationships turned out. I could feel the sorrow in his words and they wrapped around me and held me.

To know a man loves you so much that they desire you to find such great love with another man because they can’t give that to you… Well, I don’t think I have the words to express how loved I feel knowing that.

I hold these men, their feelings, and concern for me in a very special place. I greatly value what their friendships have brought to my life.

In those moments when I am sad and lonely… When I long to be held and loved and wonder what is wrong with me. Why everyone else around me is in a relationship and I am not… I can be comforted knowing that I am lovable. I am, indeed, loved. Eventually I will meet someone who sees what these guys see now and will not let me “get away”.

Even if that doesn’t happen… I still can rest in knowing that I am loved.